Schmidt the Ax


In a stunning reversal of my self-indulgent ways, I recently edited VirileMail to make a version for audio. The goal was to tell the story in four half hour audio segments.

A serious problem for the audio version of VirileMail is that I had a significant amount of fun making illustrations for the VirileMail novel. In addition to the “eggplant” there is the illustration shown here which was my fully geeked-out diagram of how to take control of a human brain if you happen to be a billion year old colony of invading nanobots. I suppose most of those who listen to the audio version will not really need these instructions.

I cut the original 70,000 word novel to about 18,000 words for the audio version. The most painful part of that process was removing entire characters such as Dr. Redes, head of research at Conceptions Organiques. Now, it is not as if just anyone can mind-meld with Janek…after all, that constitutes a life sentence for shared consciousness with a diabolical alien. Dr. Redes was a true “redshirt” (look at the name!) designed as a throw-away character. In contrast, Briana was written as a spunky Space Opera cadet worthy of a far better fate than spending eternity listening to Janek chiding foolish humans for their primitive ways. Poor Briana, will you ever forgive me?

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